Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Misfit have chest pain! May due to excessive amount of MSG

I felt a little pain in my chest today. Maybe its due to the pork oil I dunk my food with yesterday. Too much cholestrol in me. I spent most of the day smashing my head on my desk to make the pain go away. My colleagues as usual ignored me as they thought I was training to head-butt some clients.

Lets just hope I do not need to travel in THAT ambulance.

People have all different sort of sins or addiction, some to alcohol, drugs, gambling... yeah, its a fuckup world. Me? I have a different addiction.. MSG or monosodium gluatamete.. or something like that. Nothing beats a packet of 'flavoured' chips, except maybe threesome.

My favorite food! all laced with msg. I dont think I can bear a day without msg food. All that explained to my receding hairline. MSG and High cholestrol food.

Why do harmful food tastes so nice? Or is it that I now have issues with food? I'll think it over with some pork-chop, chips, fries, and ice-cream today.

Monday, June 26, 2006

Misfit attend birthday lunch

It was Girlboy birthday and he gave us all colleague a treat in his father's restaurant. The food is great, after the lunch out the cake and we sang birthday song which I obnoxiously sang LOUD-LOUD to embarassed him in front of other customers.. hehe.

Well, the cake looks nice and in no time, we did enjoy it nicely. Ohh, when I said nicely I meant gobble it down like hugry pigs! Then only someone realized that there was some fungus on the cake! I mean, only in the last bloody piece that someone realize we consumed something that may make us sick!

Yay! M.C. for the day!

Sure enough later the day some of the office staff travel in this vehicle.. and I mean THAT vehicle looks like some World War 2 leftovers. I can imagine conversation goes like that in the ambulance during rush hour emergency cases.

Patient: It's too hot, can't breathe!
Paramedic: Sorry! But the air-cond is out of service.
Patient: [gasping for air]
Paramedic: Driver, whats taking so long?
Ambulance driver: Sorry, rush hour jam and the bateries out. Can't put on the siren.
Paramedic: Well, just make sure we can reach by lunch time, I'm starving.


p/s: lets hope this time they have prettier nurse.

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Misfit Buy Number!

WAhkau! @#$x^@*yx*!!! Darn it.. the second time it happened this month! Buy number also misfit! How to get rich?!

post 20jun06 14:47
blinky asked why am I playing with numbers when world cup is going on. Cause I'm a sucker for numbers and you can't really gamble $1 with someone can't you?

post 21jun06 14:14
again, the number I bought yesterday 1155 came out 1154! ^$@x!$%!#$z *beep *beep!!!
buying again today! keep you finger crossed!

Friday, June 16, 2006

Are Arabs Horny?

LZ just got a job in an Arab country, below is part of the chat between us:

LZ: here got 1000 channel
LZ: but dono which channel can watch world cup
me: got WahLaiToi channel or not? hehehe
LZ: a lot channels need to pay
me: icic
LZ: here got a lot porn channel
LZ: its crazy
LZ: i thought muslim country cannot
me: huh? islamic country.. all hypocrite one
LZ: got around 20 channel like that
me: hehe.. i want to move there already
LZ: shocked when i saw
LZ: hahaha
LZ: men here very horny
LZ: if no islam, dono wat'll happen to them
me: i know... arab people like that one... read arabian nights and u will know...
LZ: wherever we go sure got car honk at us
LZ: or follow us
LZ: some cars purposely turn back to see us
LZ: some even talk to us, or throw his phone number out
LZ: nutcase
me: huah.. wait they abduct wo...
LZ: my friends met one even worst
LZ: ask them to get into his car and offer 500
LZ: think they are prostitutes
me: hahaha...
me: do part time
LZ: are u crazy!?

And they say these place are hardcore religious. A misfit in Arab perhaps? Next time we should publish a book like this

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Misfit Answer to Greetings

Dont you just hate it when people ask: "how are you?" Especially when they don't really bother with the answer. I blame this on the society today. Yes its a fuckup world and I for once glad being a misfit that I'm not one of them. Below are some of the answer to them. Whether they noticed or not, WHO CARES! They don't really care about you anyway.

Question: How are you today?


I hate you for asking this!

Fine, just very fucked up!

Not good, but not dead yet!

What?! (they ask again) Huh?! What?!.. (repeat infinitely)

Shut up!

Good! in fact I've just won enough money in lottery to hire a hitman... what for?! to shoot anyone who ask this stupid question.

I don't know, just woke up from the meeting earlier.

What?! Your Wife/Girlfriend didn't tell you about the great time we had last night?

No, I haven't won the jackpot yet.

Darn bored! Entertain me!

Hahahahahaha! Huh? You're not joking?

How convenient of you asking after I spend the last hour diarrhea in toilet.

Don't ask me that! It's bad luck to answer it? (and act like some religious shit)

Do you really care? Or you're just another two face prick?

Do you really care?.. You do? then can I hang out with you everyday? better still, can i move in with you? No? I knew you're a two face prick!

And my favourite

Poor, until you can find my name under the definition of 'Poor' in dictionary!

p/s: I've actually used most of them but get different results

post 16/06/2006

cafuheva: same as yesterday
n305er: What you want?
spanker: Horny, how are you?
aLittleMisfit: still same

Monday, June 05, 2006

Party Misfit: Germany '06 Kick-Off Party Review

In the weekend, I was given 3 free tickets to attend the Hotlink Germany '06 Kick-Off Party in A'Farmosa resort Malacca. Wow, I actually won something. Woohoo... Oh wait! I've actually confirmed with the Maxis staff that no hidden costs in those “free" ticket. Hehehe Oh well. Prior to the party, my colleague gave me his tickets, which make it 6 tickets that I have in my hand.

So, I pass my extra 4 tickets to my cousin, Cousin-N. Well, this cousin is the clubbing type; so naturally it would be fun for him. Me? I would be going with MyGF. I anticipate that it would be fun with the buildup going on, few international DJs, large area in a theme park; it seems going to be one hell of party. Boy, am I wrong. It is another of the misfit case that I never wanted to admit will happen before it fucking actually happen.

Due to unexpected family matters by MyGF, we arrived to the party nearly 11p.m (party started 8p.m). First, they charge $5 for the parking, "Fine!" I think, but finding parking space proves difficult, which thanks to those dumbass organizer's staff who guided me over 500 METERS away from avenue. After all the huffing and puffing, I finally reach the place which my ever amazing Cousin-N not even reaches A-Farmosa (He went with his group of friends). Even worst is that there were even enough parking for Godzillas to mate right in front of the avenue.

So, I spent another 30 minutes outside of the avenue waiting for Cousin-N to arrive. Luckily MyGF didn't mind waiting with me. While I was waiting, I saw some people leaving already. Mummers like "boring!", "nothing!", "like a disco", "like fun fare" were among the stuff I've overheard. Pardon my photo's not sharp as I only uses my camera phone for all the snapshot.

When I've finally entered the "Party", I was disappointed. I mean, this WAS supposed to be a World Fucking Cup Party! The only connection I saw with soccer is the big replica of the world cup trophy, a booth with countries body painting, neon light arranged to look like a ball, and beanbag chair which the "bean" is tiny balls. That's it, the connection end. The party is actually an open air disco, the DJs on a stage playing house music where people below “shaking”, or showing their stuff, some just stand there (me included) looking at the light. “Must NOT follow light!”, “Must NOT follow light!” Oh well, at least there were other misfits too.

I deem this party not successful. Most people were not dancing, and even less people actually respond to the DJs. Maybe because there wasn’t enough drink to go around. Hehe, speaking of drinks, sorry, seems the $60 a ticket wasn’t enough to cover any drinks. So there I was, spending the time walking around. There’s an instance where all of us were very near to the stage, the speaker was SOOO loud that I can barely breathe. Cousin-N was starting to dance and seems enjoying himself, whether he dances himself or the chick he brought purposely ignored him, which I couldn’t figure out. Top that with some sweaty shirtless guys dancing nearby, holding hands and hugging with his mates looks gay to me. Oh My GOD! They ARE gays. Hehe. In this stage I might as well join the dance, except when me and MyGF together, we put the B in boring. I just can’t start to “Go with the beat!” awkwardly I look like a drowning pelican, or a choking flamingo.

Half an hour later Cousin-N called,

Cousin-N: “Hey! Where are you?”

Me: “On the way back home already.”

Thursday, June 01, 2006

Man should be like this

My work consist of designing structural and consult clients of whichever (dumb) thinking that they might have respectively for their home, factory, office, bla bla bla... (more about my job on later post) Well, I was saying, few days earlier, a couple came over my office to discuss renovation for their home. The husband is the overmanly, boss in the house, or what sometimes might some people call, a jerk to his wife. (The wife by the way, looks great for a mid-30s women, just too much make-up) During the course of discussion, especially when the husband or I am explaining something and the wife wants to give her *ahem "opinion", the husband would retort "you quiet la dear, let me explain".  The wife then kept quiet of a while, afterwards when we further our discussions, she give opinion again... then the husband says again.. "You dont talk, I talk"... hehehe.. after the fifth time the husband retort the wife, I really felt like saying this:HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!!Yeah! I wish I have the guts, but my lady boss is in the room beside and I wouldn't risk getting on the bad side of her day. Oh, when I say bad side, I meant putting my head in front of a 10-tonne truck running 110kph. People with lady boss most probably get what I meant.  
Ok, back to topic, the great QUESTION here is....  
                   HOW do I act like the husband and get away with it?
and the darn wife seems OK to be boss around by the husband.. and I wonder, why can't I be like that jerk too and get away with it? Well, seems some people are born jerk and lucky. This guy would get my vote for "Husband of the Year" award... and after they left the wife call in to check on some stuff. She talked to my colleague Boygirl! AND she unbelievably told Boygirl I am good looking. WTF? Me?! A balding fatass! Seems to get me interested! hehe, threesome here perhaps.. Oh well, that means I'm gonna be the office laughing stock for some period now. Hmmm..... threesome..

Q: Why can't I fit in anywhere?
A: How the hell I know!